Wednesday, July 05, 2006

THREE BITS.

three short (for me) posts.

1. I was in Safeway last week, post work. I was picking up a few things for dinner and the guy behind was dressed in a slightly wrinkled button-down shirt and navy blue work pants (slacks) from Banana Republic or some other nondescript business casual retail store (Eddie Bauer? No - they weren't "broken in" enough. J.Crew? No - they weren't preppy enough. Club Monaco? No they weren't euroskinny enough. I'll stick with my first guess Banana Republic). He obviously was coming from work as well.

My basket of groceries held various items for dinner - pork chops, corn, broccoli, cherries (which I'm currently obsessed with). I placed them on the black conveyor belt and then added the courtesy separator bar after my grocery selection.

He placed his items behind me - one large 1.75 liter of Skyy Vodka, two 1 liter bottles of tonic, and 2 limes - unbagged, placed directly on the conveyor belt.

I looked at his groceries. And then I looked at my groceries. And then back to his.

I wanted to lean over and ask him if he was having company or if it was just a really hard day at work. I didn't. I figured it was more interesting not knowing and having to guess.

2. AJ and I were at Cafe Floré last weekend. I was working on my previous blog entry, and he was working on his. A slightly daft woman with bottle dyed red hair walks by and hands us a flyer for CUAV. Apparently they were looking for volunteers to help lead talks about violence in the gay and lesbian community.

She was the sort of woman who you'd think would be in recovery, but as she sat down next to us she had in hand a bloody mary. She proceeded to loudly chit chat with the gentleman across the table, about various people they knew and what happened in her life for the past week.

She then turned to AJ and I and again reiterated that they were always looking for volunteers for CUAV, and asked if we knew what CUAV was.

I pointed to AJ and said he used to be high school teacher, and that the CUAV people had come to his high school several times to talk about violence in the GLBT community. She nodded pleased that we knew of the organizations.

"You know, we really REALLY need speakers and volunteers. It's a great organization. That's why I am always handing out the flyer, even when I'm not working. I'm that dedicated." she gushed all the while sipping her bloody mary.

"And you know we could really use you especially." As she points to me.

"Oh." I respond, not quite sure how to take it. " Why? Because you need more people of color?"

"Oh no. It's because we need younger people." she explains.

"Um. Actually we're the same age."

I haven't let AJ live that one down yet.

3. AJ and I went hiking on 4th of July before the fireworks. We got a late start and ended up going over to Mt. Tam for about two or three hours. It was quite fun, though it's obvious that I haven't spent that much time in nature in ages. I kept on proclaiming "look! a lizard!" everytime I saw one. I think AJ was amused by my excitement about wildlife, no matter how small it was.

I will say that we did see other wildlife during the hike and picnic and drive including a hawk flying over us a couple of times (my guess is that it was a red shoulded hawk, but I might be wrong, I didn't get a good look), along with two wild turkeys. I asked AJ if he thought they might have been feral turkeys, but he said that it was highly unlikely that any local residents had turkeys for pets and they had escaped back into the wild. After much thought, I agreed with him.

After the short hike, we stopped by an Albertson Grocery Store to pick up some water. We had brought a few cookie bars with us, and though they had aged well, they were also incredibly sweet, and thus needed some water to wash them down with. We had consumed most of our water on our hike.

Strangely the Albertson was going out of business. I have never been to a "going out of business" grocery store sale. It had me very wary of all the perishable goods there. What if they just left the food out, unrefrigerated or beyond the expiration date? What did they care? They were going out of business - it's not as if someone could come back and return it or sue them.

The numerous "ALL SALES FINAL" signs that dotted the landscape of the store did not instill any sense of security either.

AJ and I stocked up on some wine (20% off!) and some Perrier (it was bottled water, we figured the worse that could happen was that it was flat) and some tea (hey it's already dried out).

I also impulsively bought some gum, some mints, and three packs of JONES SODA CO carbonated candy. These babies come in FUFU BERRY, BERRY LEMONADE, and GREEN APPLE. I (of course) had to buy all three. They were 20% off of 50¢!

The checkout clerk was cracked out. She had the nappiest braided hair extensions that I have ever seen on a white woman. I also think she might have had Lee Press On Nails.

In short, she made the ghetto shopping experience that much more authentic.

During the check out she carded AJ, who was very flattered. When he stated as such, she went on a diatribe about how everyone in town started drinking early. They start as young as 9 years old she said, all matter of fact. And they look it too, coming in to buy liquor at the age of 21 looking like they were 40. She said that both of us looked younger than most of them, after they had been drinking hard for 12 years of their life. And she said that we both looked the same age. AJ seemed especially pleased by this statement.

I wanted to ask her when she had started drinking, but I refrained. We left the grocery store with our alcohol and our breath mints (she had charged us for four Jones Soda Co. Carbonated Candy packages but we didn't feel like making a stink for 40¢) and with the hope that it would be a long long time until we visited another ghetto grocery store.

The Jones Soda Co Carbonated Candy is disgusting by the way. Avoid it with all your might.

2 Comments:

At 10:28 PM, Blogger Rita said...

Ooh ooh ew. That Jones Soda Web site already looks like the candy would taste disgusting.

Ooh ooh ew!

I'm totally laughing you bought the candy on sale and then got overcharged. Hysterical. :D

r

 
At 1:39 AM, Blogger schmumu said...

ghetto grocery stores are awesome! such places of discovery. i was able to buy a tomato in a Philly ghetto grocery store that had no taste! i was really impressed.

 

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